|
|
Is it right to hire “family” over experience? If you were hiring someone for a position, as an LGBT person, would you hire another LGBT person just because of their sexual orientation? Some people would and some others would say that it is your obligation to do so. Personally, I will hire the candidate that best fits the requirements of the job which is not always the LGBT job candidate.
While I agree that diversity is very important in any company, you have to keep personal feelings at bay when hiring. As a computer programming professional, I must obtain and retain the best talent possible. Experiences counts most. Of course, if you find a good gay programmer, hop on him or her!
Hiring someone with a good work ethic and personality is also important because you want the person to fit in with the work environment. It’s always a judgment call and one must make a choice that will be best for the company’s needs. It is not fair to hire one person over another due to a special trait or quality (such as sexual orientation). People with the best skills should be considered first. That is what makes it fair. Too much of business is about hiring kiss asses, brownnosers, and friends who know nothing. We should stand for equality. That is what I have always tried to do. I would ask you all to do so too!
Am I seeing this as too black-and-white? What you you think?
By now you’re probably wondering what exactly makes a job homophobic. Well, simply put, homophobia at work that makes you want to quit. Actually, it is whatever you want to make of it. I’ll give you and overview of my worst work experience that was the catalyst for this whole site. This story will get fleshed out in further posts.
Imagine working for a company through an employment agency on a six month contract that grants a “right to hire” at the end of the contract. Next, imagine having to interview (again) for the position in which you have been working, after everyone has applauded your work. Third, let us pretend that you go through a grueling interview with the president/owner of the company. During that interview, you learn that this person does not trust you. To beat that, there is the talk about how you will be working for a Christian company with high Christian values and morals.
Personally, I have been a Lutheran (protestant Christian) for all 29 years of my life. Did I mention that the interviewee may have said during the interview that he has no problems adhering to Christian values but does not like people who go against the principles of caring for your neighbors, kindness, charity, and acceptance of differing views in the face of God to hurt others? After that enormous sentence, ponder this: what if the interviewer told the gay guy that he didn’t want to see or hear anything gay?
Whether we want to admit it or not, sometimes we are required to have a “straight” interview. Often we see large conservative organizations such as banks or computer companies as monolithic giants that want straight-laced employees. In the heydays of IBM, the service engineers all wore navy blue polyester suits with black wing-tip shoes, a black tie, and a pressed white shirt that was adorned with a pocket protector. Did I mention the horned-rim glasses?
Jokes aside, sometimes we have to beat the system in order to land a job. Especially in these trying economic times we must turn off the stereotype for a few hours and pull out the parts of us that we unfortunately portray. Here are my pointers for guys and gals on how to clean up for a straight-acting interview.
Gays.
- Do not wear the following colors: pink, purple, fucsia, lime green, indigo, etc.
- Do not wear a tie from Hermes or one that has any type of cartoon character or animal on it. When in doubt, go for a solid color or a traditional pattern so long as it is the only pattern in your outfit.
- Do not wear anything from the second-hand store that could be considered “retro.”
- Do not wear glasses with small wire frames (think, John Lennon) or any made of plastic. Stick to “normal” sized glasses that are wire framed or rimless.
- Absolutely forget about having a hairstyle that looks like it came out of Details.
- Do not fully cross your legs.
- Minimize hand gestures.
- Stiffen that limp wrist.
- If offered a beverage, keep that pinkie finger in!
- Greet your interviewers with a firm, manly handshake.
- Wear a plain suit with a solid cotton shirt (white or light blue) and leather shoes.
- Fine Italian, hand-stitched suits should only be worn for high-level sales positions.
- Leave the pocket square at home with your concealer.
Gals.
- Act like a lady.
- Shave your armpits.
- Shave your legs.
- Wax your upper lip.
- Wear natural looking makeup.
- Wear a bra.
- Sit with your legs or ankles crossed.
- Wear a little bit of a heal, but not hooker shoes.
- Your shoes should be dainty, not clunky.
- Wear a nice dress or business suit with a skirt or pants.
- Pantyhose, knee highs, etc. are just not in fashion.
- Brush your hair.
- Consider a silk camisole underpinning or a blouse with feminine details.
Note: this was meant to be a little funny. Unfortunately, I usually have to explain my jokes. 
I dated a guy at work once. Of course, I made this the last time. Not only is dating a bad thing to do at work, but dating a closeted guy is really bad. I was the only one in the world that he was out to. We dated for about six months until I called it off. As far as I knew, no one at work had any idea that we were dating. That, as it turns out, was far from the truth.
About a year after we broke up, another guy was leaving the company, so I went to his goodbye party. I didn’t really know the guy that was leaving, but I could hardly pass up a happy hour. One of my former boyfriend’s co-workers came up to me and said, “So, you and X really were dating, weren’t you?” I was pretty dumbfounded. As I tend to tell the truth, I said that we had dated.
Most of the people around us at the bar were not surprised. They had heard it all before in the rumor mill. Their surprise was that I was gay, not that their closeted co-worker was gay. X’s co-workers wanted him to come out. He was… umm… flaming. People do come in more colorful, effeminate shades, but he was pretty obvious to everyone. Believe it or not, many times your co-workers will guess your sexual orientation before you confess it.
The real moral of the story is that no matter how descrete you are, people will gossip if they think you are gay, let alone dating another guy at work. Surprisingly, the only people who did not know that X and I dated were my immediate co-workers.
Now, I know that this is more of a personal story than an article, but I gotta have fun sometimes! I’m also looking for guest bloggers. Unfortunately, a rare chronic pain disorder keeps me from blogging all the time. Stories, anecdotes, articles, poetry… I’ll take any of it!
I am certainly not a lawyer. Unfortunately, it does not take one to understand the U.S. Government’s policies on discrimination. Every time you seek employment you will see a statement that says:
This company does not discriminate on the basis of race, color, religion, sex, national origin, disability, or age.
We all hope these statements are true, especially if they include things like sexual orientation and/or gender identity. The items listed above are protected by law. The company I work for adds sexual orientation to the list of people that they don’t discriminate against. You would think that if a company puts sexual orientation in their equal opportunity employment (EOE) statement that they would have to adhere to it. The federal government doesn’t even adhere to their own words.
It is the policy of the government of the United States to provide equal opportunity in federal employment for all persons, to prohibit discrimination in employment because of race, color, religion, sex, national origin, handicap, age, sexual orientation or status as a parent, and to promote the full realization of equal employment opportunity through a continuing affirmative program in each executive department and agency. This policy of equal opportunity applies … to the extent permitted by law.
It goes downhill from here.
The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) does not enforce the protections that prohibit discrimination and harassment based on sexual orientation, status as a parent, marital status and political affiliation. However, other federal agencies and many states and municipalities do.
For years I thought that these statements were enforceable, but I guess not. It is legal for a company to say one thing and do another when it comes to discrimination based on sexual orientation. We need a comprehensive law to pass that gives us protection on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. Some day…
U.S. Gov’t EOE Statement
I was talking to my mom on Saturday about ideas for topics to cover here. With her being straight, I was profoundly dumbstruck at some small items that I would entirely miss. She brought up many topic ideas from how to handle inadvertent gay comments from coworkers to whether a parent should talk about their gay son or daughter at lunchtime.
I’m asking anyone out there to please contribute your stories and articles about being gay at work, whether out or in the closet. We really need a good resource created by ordinary people for ordinary people.
Tomorrow, a new article covering something a little less somber!
In my position I’ve had the chance to sit on the other side of the interview table. This has given me some good insight into the motivations for the questions asked by both the interviewer and interviewee. While in the most homophobic job I’ve ever had, I had a chance to perform a phone interview with a very nice lady. By chance, I forgot that she was scheduled to call me at a certain time. She heard my name on my voicemail and did some Google’ing. I called her back and proceeded with the interview.
This woman found me on the Internet and discovered that I was gay. She was the first person to ever ask if the company I worked for offered domestic partner benefits. It caught me off guard to say the least. In fact, she said, “Do you have D-P benefits”? Right away I knew that she was a lesbian. We somehow came about to mutually understanding our shared same-sex orientation. It really made me think about how we should ask a potential employer about domestic partner benefits. I say this because it still is illegal in most places to discriminate against people based on their sexual orientation and/or gender identity.
For me, asking about domestic partner benefits during an interview would be worse than the interview itself. Fortunately, larger companies, and even some smaller ones, will list the availability of domestic partner benefits on their websites, but not all. I may be totally exposed on the Internet, but directly confronting the issue of my sexual orientation during an interview is terrifying at best. The easy way out is if you are told about the company’s benefits during the interview, but that may not happen, especially if you are having a technical interview.
For people who are comfortable, please, ask the question. What harm is it? You may not get the job. That is your only loss. Would you want to work for that company anyway? I wouldn’t, but why am I afraid to ask about “D-P” benefits? If I had all the answers I’d be rich. We must remember though, that nearly all potential employers will see you asking the question equal to you coming out. I did it and so would you.
The interview ended on a good note. She understood from my tone that it was not necessarily a gay friendly environment. I feel good about the result because I would not want another person to experience what I did. That leads me to this question, how would you ask a potential employer about domestic partner benefits?
 Loading ...
 American Airlines is probably one of the most recognized companies for their support of LGBT rights along with their support of other minorities. For years we have heard about their commitment to diversity which seems genuine. Other companies also come to mind, but perhaps not as prominently. Many companies tend to downplay their level of diversity in order to not turn away potential employees, others don’t care. AMR Corp. is one of those companies that seeks a diverse workforce and gets it. I know that I sometimes will be critical of these types of awards and surveys, but companies that present time and again on these lists about their efforts at non-discrimination, workplace equality, etc. should be commended.
Unfortunately, in this economy airline travel is week along with the airlines’ ability to hire new employees. My question to any current or former employee of American Airlines is this, how have your experiences with workplace equality?
American Airlines Named One of Nation’s ‘Best Places for Diverse Managers to Work’ by DiversityMBA Magazine – Apr 09, 2009.
In most situations, a company that offers benefits for a domestic partner as they would a spouse is doing so on their own. Most places in this country, if any, require an employer to offer domestic partner benefits. Doing so is good stewardship and does help a company gain and maintain talent. I felt more at ease with my sexual orientation at work in a company that offered benefits to domestic partners. We should only see more of this in the future. Here are some pros and cons of companies offering domestic partner and domestic partner child benefits.
Pros:
- Shows a company in favor of LGBT rights.
- Shows generosity in offering domestic partner benefits.
- Makes a company more attractive to the LGBT community.
- Helps retain LGBT employees.
- Shows that a company is liberal.
- Displays that a company cares about all of its employees.
- Shows that a company offers top-tier benefits.
- Helps the company gain exposure in the LGBT community (by advertising, review, or the HRC’s Corporate Equality Index).
- Shows a company that is in touch with their employee’s needs.
- Shows a company that has close ties to its local community.
Cons:
- Shows that a company is liberal.
- Some will see the company as anti-family and/or anti-religion.
- Could turn off homophobes.
How does a company define the term domestic partner? This question is answered in a variety of ways depending on your employer if in fact that even offer benefits to your domestic partner. First off, some companies offering domestic partner benefits, in an effort to be fair, also offer them to straight, unmarried couples. A company must create and adhere to a strict definition of domestic partner if not defined by the law. By offering domestic partner benefits to straight couples in addition to gay couples, it somewhat makes it easier on job candidates to ask about them.
Let’s look at two cases. Like I said yesterday, from a cursory Google search it appears that it’s mostly universities, states, and government contractors that offer domestic partner benefits. From that search we are looking at two organizations, the University of Pennsylvania (Penn) and SAIC. Penn has been operating as a college/university since the mid 18th century. They have offered same-sex domestic partner benefits for the last 9.5 years (possibly 13 years; unsure from evidence). Penn has about 4,000 faculty plus 12,000 additional staff and is based in Philadelphia. SAIC is 10bn USD Fortune 500 defense contractor with 45,000 employees and has been operating in the US, based in San Diego, for 40 years. They offer same and opposite sex domestic partner benefits. I have no current ties to either organization and chose them for their domestic partnership benefits visibility.
Both organizations require that domestic partners not be married nor domestically partnered to anyone else. The employee and partner cannot be blood relatives and must live together. The couple also must be financially dependent on each other. These sound like very reasonable rules. Penn does not seem to have one restriction that SAIC does. SAIC requires the couple to live together for at least a year.
The length of co-habitation requirement is not uncommon. Unfortunately, the law pushes companies in that direction because there is no single legal definition of what a domestic partner is. It takes a weekend in Vegas for a straight couple to get married. Is that fair? They can get benefits after a one night stand, but we sometimes have to wait. It is much better to be able to get full benefits after a wait than no benefits… ever. SAIC takes domestic partner benefits one step forward from Penn in offering domestic partner benefits, under the exact same rules, to opposite sex partners. It’s really based on “fairness.” Honestly, if you’re straight, get married to get your 1,016 or so federal rights. There we are: two organizations, two different definitions of domestic partner, two different lists of requirements to prove the existence of a domestic partner.
Until we have equal rights under the law, we will have to let men in suits define what a loving partner is to us. We don’t place limits on who can get married, so why should we have to set limits on who can be considered a domestic partner? Obviously these corporations and universities do not want people taking advantage of domestic partner benefits, so what stops straight people from getting hitched just for the benefits? As a final word I will just say that I am glad that some companies are willing to stick their necks out by offering domestic partner benefits. I thank them for recognizing the LGBT community and helping support us. Let’s hope it will get better in the future.
UPenn: Domestic Partner Affidavit, Same-sex Domestic Partner Benefits
SAIC: Registered Domestic Partners
|
|
